Category Archive: Advice

Ask Ambrose – “My Giant Animal Is Driving Me Nuts”

Cyclopean Cat Problem Dear Ambrose, A couple of weeks ago I made the mistake of buying a giant cat, and now it is wrecking my house and terrorizing my family. For a while there I thought I would tough it out, and the family and I have been sleeping on a floating mattress in the …

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Ask Ambrose – a Quartet of Troublesome Pets

Grim Puss Problem Dear Ambrose, My cat is always very serious. I am worried he may have a heart attack and drop dead. What can I do to make him lighten up? Worried Cat Owner, Pennsylvania Dear Worried Cat Owner, I suggest sitting your cat down on the couch and showing him some funny movies. …

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How to Grow Moss

Growing moss is not as easy as one might assume, but with patience and the right attitude it can be done. The first thing to do is find yourself a nice shady spot. Under a tree in your garden should do. As moss likes buttermilk, you should first soak your clothing in said substance, then …

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